Through the early morning fog I saw a familiar shape. With each step through the mist, the face came in clear. It was Bag-Head Jheri, the Messanie Street philosopher, in full effect.

“Weston, what up dog? I ain’t seen you in a hot minute,” Bag said cheerfully.

“I was going to ask you the same thing. What have you been up to?” I asked.

“Ah been taking a break from reality for a while,” Bag answered solemnly. “The world been gettin’ too crazy for me.”

“What do you mean?” I asked. “People have been saying that for a long time.”

“Yeah but we living in a world where Newt Gingrich is a being taken seriously as a presidential candidate, our President Obama is pushing birth control pills, gas prices rise higher at the same time oil companies make record profits, celebrity deaths take over all the news channels, downtown parking coming back again ... it’s all coming at me crooked,” Bag said. “I used to dream up stuff like this back in the day when I smoked weed. That’s why I say they should go ‘head on and legalize it.”

“What?!?!?” I asked incredulously.

“It’s sort of a reverse reality thing,” Bag in all seriousness tried to explain. “If you’re sober and the world looks crazy maybe if we smoke some weed things will look normal.”

“But Bag, the experts say marijuana use may lead to harder drugs,” I said.

“Hard times lead to harder drugs. You heard?” Bag answered quickly.

“What beef you got with Downtown parking? You don’t drive,” I asked, trying to change the subject.

“Who’s gonna pay to park in front of an empty building or a Downtown bar that’s closed during the day?” Bag asked.

“The city could use the revenue,” I answered.

“The city needs some common sense. First they take the meters out to draw business now they wanna put them back in to draw business,” Bag said. “Now I see why the Downtown folks need that big clock at Coleman Hawkins Park. They don’t know what time it is.”

“That’s not nice to say, Bag,” I said.

“Just kicking out the knowledge they don’t teach you in college, brother,” Bag answered.

“Uh yeah ... OK,” I struggled to answer.

“Now tell me this ain’t whack. Newt Gingrich saying we ougtha replace school janitors with poor children,” Bag said. “Then he said janitors make absurd amounts of money.”

“Yes, he said something to that effect. He was trying to solve the job crisis I guess,” I answered feebly.

“Sounds to me like somebody’s smoking something and it’s stronger than marijuana,” Bag said.

“It does sound like something straight out of Charles Dickens doesn’t it?” I answered.

“And what’s up with Obama getting involved in Catholic business?” Bag said changing course quickly.

“Well, Obama changed his mind about the ruling requiring faith-based employers to pay for contraception,” I said.

“That’s too much gov’ment, brotha,” Bag said,

On that note, I said goodbye and slowly watched him walk back into the mist from whence he came.

Alonzo Weston’s column runs on Wednesdays. He can be reached at alonzo.weston@newspressnow.com and on Twitter: @SJNPWeston.